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I'm not okay.. and it's not okay to treat single women with disrespect

9/30/2019

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It's not okay to stalk someone, worst on a drunk state especially women who are living alone.
I moved away from the city and live far away from the chaos. I love my new house and everything is so peaceful.. until the universe tested me. 
On this new place where people didn't know what is "civil" and "proper", they already break the rules of personal space. 
As a woman living alone, new in town,  with neighbors far away from me, disasters happen.
I love living alone and I have never been frustrated and crazy enough to think of shooting someone in my entire life. My peaceful home turn into disaster. 
Above is the photo of the town official who has the habit of lingering around my house, stalking me while walking with my dogs or whenever I'm out and trimming my lawn. 

I didn't notice it at first. After 3 months that I moved in, he started greeting my housekeeper since he knows his late husband. I ignored it at first, thinking he was patrolling and doing his business but things get creepy whenever my housekeeper would take days off on weekends, he started parking his car near my house or standing nearby at the time I'm having my afternoon teas in the garden. 

You would tell me that I have to report him right? Yes, I did everything to get this creep out of my sight. Unfortunately in the Philippines, whistling, staring are not form of harassment yet. As long as they are doing nothing harm, they will not get punish. 

So what did I do? I started blogging my day to day horrific experience. I even put up it's own Facebook page and since I'm criticizing their beloved town officer, the fellow members of the town office started harassing me - 1. They called me to their office and said something that I violated and shamed their town chief.  I ignored them. 2. The police won't do anything about it since I'm not harm yet, and they are reporting to the town officials. 

It's the first time that I felt so helpless as a woman. Shame to those women officers in this town who supports this kind of attitude. 

I put up my house on airbnb so I don't have to be alone on weekends.  Few months passed, I've met some higher officials in town and I shared him what's bothering me and his reaction was the same like these town's people. He only reassured me that people in this town has good records and no record so far of any crime. He only visited me twice after he heard I called the police to report the town chief. 

Few months passed then I've met this guy and started dating him. I was in a bad place and I felt so out of control. I attracted people who were not good for me. When he found out what's happening to me, his response was to ignore the situation. As long as I'm not harm by anyone. - Like I never heard it before. 

It's such a great relief when I got rid of this guy after two months of dating him. What I have done to myself for dating such a loser?!! I lost my head for awhile there. 

For sure I'm not the only one who experience harassment such as staring, stalking, whistling and other forms which they called - "oh it's nothing you know, they are not doing anything to you". 

Yes, it's called disrespecting my personal space and overstepping boundaries. It's disrespecting single women who wants to live alone. I hope these types of people go f*ck themselves in hell. 

The emotional distress cannot be cured by ignoring it.
It's one of social awareness that we have to tell the world that we are dealing with perverts every single day and people around us comfort us by telling "it's okay, there's nothing wrong with it". 
​NO IT'S NOT OKAY. 
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